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Armaggeddon!
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Mortitia (the missus) work in a mortuary, she told me about a guy (obviously he was dead) who had bought one of those chin-up bars that hook on over the door frame and was lowering himself on to a broom handle - the chin-up bar slipped off and the guy got shish kebabed!“Do or do not... there is no try.”
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The Armeggeddon story remainds me of this old Joke:
Three Dogs
It was a dismal day, and at the local vets surgery three dogs were discussing why they were there.
The first dog (a poodle) told the other two that he had chewed the master's favorite slippers once too often , and was going to be ‘Put to sleep’for the deed.
The second dog (a Yorkshire terrier) told a similar story about a new suite of furniture. He too was to be ‘Put to sleep’.
“What about you, what’s your story?" said the poodle to the third dog, which happened to be a very large German Shepherd .
The German Shepherd proceeded to tell his story.
“My story starts when my pretty young mistress was taking a shower with the bathroom door open, and on seeing her in this state of undress, I barked very loudly. Startled, she then dropped the soap, and bent down to pick it up……, well, I don’t know what came over me, but I could not control my sexual urges…………………….
I suppose you are going to be destroyed?” said the poodle.
“No" said the german Shepherd…………………….
“I am in to have my claws clipped!“Do or do not... there is no try.”
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Originally posted by puddlesurfer View PostMortitia (the missus) work in a mortuary, she told me about a guy (obviously he was dead) who had bought one of those chin-up bars that hook on over the door frame and was lowering himself on to a broom handle - the chin-up bar slipped off and the guy got shish kebabed!
if she had heard of the bloke in rotherham
gave his missus a dieseas that growns on dead bodys
he was well ya know having it with the dead at work
fekin sicko
jusy wondered if ya wife heard owt about it with being in the same sort of job
it was about 6 years ago nowam not die lex sick its you that cant read mate
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Originally posted by JUDWAK View Postask ya missus
if she had heard of the bloke in rotherham
gave his missus a dieseas that growns on dead bodys
he was well ya know having it with the dead at work
fekin sicko
jusy wondered if ya wife heard owt about it with being in the same sort of job
it was about 6 years ago nowOh Nana, what's my name?
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