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A good-OLE-boy staggered home late after another
evening with his drinking buddies.
Shoes in left hand to avoid waking his wife, he tiptoed
as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their
upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step in the
darkened entryway. As he caught himself by grabbing
the banister, his body swung around and he landed
heavily on his rump.
A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made
the landing especially painful. Managing to suppress a
yelp, he sprung up, pulled down his pants and examined
his lacerated and bleeding cheeks in the mirror of a
nearby darkened hallway, then managed to find a large
full box of band aids before proceeding to place a patch
as best he could on each place he saw blood.
After hiding the now almost empty box, he managed to
shuffle and stumble his way to bed.
Morning, he awakens with screaming pain in head and
butt to find his wife staring at him from across the room,
and hears her say: "You were drunk again last night!!!"
Forcing himself to ignore his agony, he looked meekly
at her and replied: "Now Hon, why would you say such
a mean thing?"
"Well," she said, "there is the front door left open, the
glass at the bottom of the stairs, the drops of blood
trailing through the house, and your bloodshot eyes but,
mostly.....it's all those band aids stuck on the downstairs
mirror!"
evening with his drinking buddies.
Shoes in left hand to avoid waking his wife, he tiptoed
as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their
upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step in the
darkened entryway. As he caught himself by grabbing
the banister, his body swung around and he landed
heavily on his rump.
A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made
the landing especially painful. Managing to suppress a
yelp, he sprung up, pulled down his pants and examined
his lacerated and bleeding cheeks in the mirror of a
nearby darkened hallway, then managed to find a large
full box of band aids before proceeding to place a patch
as best he could on each place he saw blood.
After hiding the now almost empty box, he managed to
shuffle and stumble his way to bed.
Morning, he awakens with screaming pain in head and
butt to find his wife staring at him from across the room,
and hears her say: "You were drunk again last night!!!"
Forcing himself to ignore his agony, he looked meekly
at her and replied: "Now Hon, why would you say such
a mean thing?"
"Well," she said, "there is the front door left open, the
glass at the bottom of the stairs, the drops of blood
trailing through the house, and your bloodshot eyes but,
mostly.....it's all those band aids stuck on the downstairs
mirror!"