Pub

[BUSHWHACKER]

Guy walks into a pub and asks for 12 vodkas. The barman lines them up and watches him knock them back. "****ing hell mate, what's the celebration?"
"First bj," says the guy. The barman congratulates him. "Let me buy you another one."
"Nah. **** it. If 12 dont take the taste away, 13 aint gonna!"

Mrs B :]

[BUSHWHACKER]

Zoo

A man and his wife went to the zoo. They noticed the gorilla had got a hard on as he looked at the wife. Her husband says "Lift your skirt up flash your knickers and tease him!" The ape goes mental. "Now get your tits out !" The ape goes ****ing berserk! The husband opens the cage and pushes his wife in. "Now try telling THAT ****er you've got a headache!

[BUSHWHACKER]

Amy winehouse bumps into princess Diana at the pearly gates, she asks Diana "why is your halo black?" Diana said "Amy your obviously still off your tits, this is a steering wheel!!"


Good night and may your god go with you
Mrs B

[gary-r]

i sniggered
loved the gorilla one

[Fricfrac]

Princess Di one is harsh, but very funny..........