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The Country Code
Guard against all risk of fire, unless setting an anti-hunt protestor alight.
Fasten all dull green tweedy waistcoats, and lace up your sensible brown brogues.
Keep dogs under proper control, unless theres a fox in the vicinity.
Keep to paths across farmland, you never know exactly where the GM crops are.
Avoid damaging fences, hedges and walls, the parish council have banned all satellite dishes.
Leave no litter, which is easy because there are no shops for ten miles in any direction.
Safeguard water supplies dont let your dog foul the footpath next to the village pond.
Protect wild life only ever practise safe sex with the local sheep.
Drive carefully on country roads, because its $$$$$$ dangerous to walk down them.
Respect the life of the countryside. Live in a town
Guard against all risk of fire, unless setting an anti-hunt protestor alight.
Fasten all dull green tweedy waistcoats, and lace up your sensible brown brogues.
Keep dogs under proper control, unless theres a fox in the vicinity.
Keep to paths across farmland, you never know exactly where the GM crops are.
Avoid damaging fences, hedges and walls, the parish council have banned all satellite dishes.
Leave no litter, which is easy because there are no shops for ten miles in any direction.
Safeguard water supplies dont let your dog foul the footpath next to the village pond.
Protect wild life only ever practise safe sex with the local sheep.
Drive carefully on country roads, because its $$$$$$ dangerous to walk down them.
Respect the life of the countryside. Live in a town
