yobit eobot.com

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

A man and his Ostrich

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • A man and his Ostrich

    A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.
    The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?"
    "I'll have the same," says the ostrich.
    A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be £9.40 please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.
    The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries, and a coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same."
    Again the man re aches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until, the two enter again.
    "The usual?" asks the waitress. "No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad," says the man. "Same," says the ostrich.
    Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be £32.62." Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your
    pocket every time?"
    "Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."
    "That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish for a million pounds or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"
    "That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.
    The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich?"
    The man sighs, pauses, and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say."
    www.daemon4x4.org

  • #2
    A huge muscular man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender
    can't help but stare at the guy because in contrast to his large muscles the
    man has a head the size of an orange. The bartender hands the guy his
    beer
    and says, "You know, I'm not gay but I want to compliment you on your
    physique, it really is phenomenal! But I have a question, why is your head
    so
    small?"

    The big guy nods slowly. He's obviously fielded this question many times.
    "One day," he begins, "I was hunting and got lost in the woods. I heard
    someone crying for help. I followed the cries and they led me to a frog
    that
    was sitting next to a stream." "No sh*t?" says the bartender, thoroughly
    intrigued. "Yeah, so I picked up the frog and it said, 'Kiss me. Kiss me
    and I will turn into a genie and grant you 3 wishes."

    "Keep going!" "I looked around to make sure I was alone and gave the frog
    a
    kiss. POOF! The frog turned into a beautiful, voluptuous, naked woman.
    She
    said, 'You now have 3 wishes.' I looked down at my scrawny 115 pound body
    and said, 'I want a body like Arnold Schwarzenneger.' She nodded, snapped
    her fingers, and POOF, there I was so huge that I ripped out of my clothes
    and was standing there naked! She then asked, 'What will be your second
    wish'"

    "What next?" begged the bartender. "I looked hungrily at her beautiful
    body
    and replied, 'I want to make sensuous love with you here by this stream."
    She nodded, laid down, and beckoned to me. We made love right there by that

    stream for hours!

    Afterwards, as we lay there next to each other, sweating from our glorious
    lovemaking, she whispered into my ear, "You know, you do have one more wish.

    What will it be?"

    I looked at her and replied, "How 'bout a little head then?"

    Comment

    Working...
    X