Fourteen things a man can do at ASDA while his wife is taking her time
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's trolleys when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies toilet.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone: 'Code 3 in Housewares'... and see what happens.
5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on credit.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set-up a tent in the Camping Department? and tell other shoppers you are sleeping over and invite them in if they bring pillows from the Bedding Department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask: "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your nose.
10. While handling large knives in the Kitchen Dept, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are located.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme from Mission Impossible.
12. Hide in a clothing rack .. . . and when people browse through, say: "PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, hit the floor and assume the fetal position and scream "NO!...It's those voices again!!!"
14. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while... then yell loudly: "There's no toilet paper in here!"
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's trolleys when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies toilet.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone: 'Code 3 in Housewares'... and see what happens.
5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on credit.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set-up a tent in the Camping Department? and tell other shoppers you are sleeping over and invite them in if they bring pillows from the Bedding Department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask: "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your nose.
10. While handling large knives in the Kitchen Dept, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are located.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme from Mission Impossible.
12. Hide in a clothing rack .. . . and when people browse through, say: "PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, hit the floor and assume the fetal position and scream "NO!...It's those voices again!!!"
14. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while... then yell loudly: "There's no toilet paper in here!"
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