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Irish Paddy went into an English pub with a strange-looking animal. Smith, the bartender, poured a drink for the customer and asked, 'Well, now, Paddy, what kind of an animal would that be you are having here?"
Paddy leaned forward and whispered, 'It's a fierce animal, begorra. It's none other than a long-nosed, long-tailed, short-legged Irish attack dog!'
Smith was sceptical. 'Well, mate, how fierce would a long-nosed, long-tailed, short-legged Irish attack dog actually be?'
'Very, very fierce indeed,' said Paddy.
'Well,' said Smith, 'Let's be making our way outside, shall we, and we'll be testing this animal of yours. I have a Rottweiler, a German Shepherd, a Dobermann Pinscher and a Pit-bull Terrier in a yard out there. We'll see how your animal measures up!'
'Oh!' said Paddy cheerfully, 'A long-nosed, long-tailed, short-legged Irish attack dog will demolish all those in one go! I got a hundred pounds to be bettin' on that!'
'A hundred pounds it is!' cried Smith triumphantly, and led the way to the pen where the Rottweiler, the German Shepherd, the Dobermann Pinscher and the Pit-bull Terrier were growling menacingly.
The long-nosed, long-tailed, short-legged Irish attack dog was put in the pen with all four other animals and the gate slammed shut.
There was a muffled yelp, a flurry of fur, then silence.
Mystified, Smith opened the gate to the pen.
There was no sign of the Doberman; no sign of the German Shepherd; no sign of the Rottweiler, and not a trace of the Pit-bull Terrier.
But there was a smile on the face of the long-nosed, long-tailed, short-legged Irish attack dog.
Smith paid up. 'I can't understand it,' he said. 'My dogs were the fiercest dogs around.
What sort of creature did you say that was? A long-nosed, long-tailed, short-legged Irish attack dog?'
'That's right,' said Paddy. 'But, to be sure, in some parts of the world, they be callin' them "crocodiles"!'
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