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  • In court

    These are from a book called Disorder in the Court, and are
    things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and
    now published by court reporters - who had the torment of staying
    calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

    Some of these are excellent.
    ______________________________ __________
    Q: Are you sexually active?
    A: No, I just lie there.
    ______________________________ _________
    Q: What is your date of birth?
    A: July 15th.
    Q: What year?
    A: Every year.
    ______________________________ ________
    Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
    A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
    ______________________________ __________
    Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
    A: Yes. Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
    A: I forget.
    Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something
    that you've forgotten?
    ______________________________ _______
    Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
    A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
    Q: How long has he lived with you?
    A: Forty-five years.
    ______________________________ _________
    Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you
    when he woke up that morning?
    A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
    Q: And why did that upset you?
    A. My name is Susan
    ______________________________ __________
    Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in
    voodoo or the occult?
    A: We both do.
    Q: Voodoo?
    A: We do.
    Q: You do?
    A: Yes, voodoo.
    ______________________________ ___________
    Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
    sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
    ______________________________ ___________
    Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
    ______________________________ ___________
    Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
    ______________________________ __________
    Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
    A: Yes.
    Q: And what were you doing at that time?
    ______________________________ __________
    Q: She had three children, right?
    A: Yes.
    Q: How many were boys?
    A: None.
    Q: Were there any girls?
    ______________________________ __________
    Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
    A: By death.
    Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
    ______________________________ __________
    Q: Can you describe the individual?
    A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
    Q: Was this a male, or a female?
    Dave
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