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Rules From The Male Side

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  • Rules From The Male Side

    We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    2. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

    3. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

    4. Crying is blackmail.

    5. Ask for what you want....!!! Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

    6. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    7. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    8. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

    9. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

    10. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

    11. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

    12. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    13. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    14. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

    15. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

    16. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

    17. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    18. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    19. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

    20. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such! topics as baseball, the shotgun
    formation, or monster trucks.

    21. You have enough clothes.

    22. You have too many shoes.

    23. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

    24. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping and SURFING
    DUNNO'S BACK ..........He never really went away!

  • #2
    Think I'll print them off and pin them on the wall.......................... .......
    or maybe I'll stick with the quiet life.......hmmm, let me see now........

    Comment


    • #3
      Oh boy - you've really done it now!!! Better watch your back next time you're at the pit!!!
      Linda

      www.4x4toys.co.uk

      Comment


      • #4
        OHH LINDA,

        I havn't upset you have I???? Does this mean yet again no more Bacon Butties for the kids?

        GUESS WOT,

        I cant make most of the dates listed for the PIT ,either working or Kids Xmas party!! Isnt that enough of a punishment!.

        Paul
        DUNNO'S BACK ..........He never really went away!

        Comment


        • #5
          yep i agree with that lot will have to send them to the misses
          so much to do , so little money , so little time

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