Things Kids Say

[kitesurf_phil]

Lets see how this thread runs........

Lesley and I took Lady and the grandchildren out for a walk. Lady kept stopping and sniffing the walls. Five year old Jasmine asks, "Grandad, whats Lady doing?"
I said, "Dogs leave messages for each other that we can't see- she's just reading her messages."
A bit further up the road and Lady is sniffing in large sweeps acros the pavement and Daniel, my grandson aged 8, pipes up and says, "I suppose she's reading dog grafitti now!"

[ohsupremebeing]

school d inner prayer

When jess my little girl went to her first school aged 5, she is really old now lol. She came home from her first day, having had a nice time and telling us all about what she had done, then she say with a long face we had to say prayers before we could eat. I asked her what was it you all have to say as the prayer, she came back with they made us say “ What the holy hell we have for tea” instead of “For what we are about to receive”. Don’t know how she got that. But that’s are jess lol.


she is going to kill me now

[kitesurf_phil]

When Jasmine was about three she was at nursery. The teacher was covering relationships. She said to one little girl, "What's your Daddys name?"

She replied, "John."

She said to Jasmine, "What's your Daddies name?"
Jaz thought for a minute and replied, "Daddy."
The teacher said, "That is what you call your Daddy. What does Mummy call Daddy?"
Jazmine thinks again and says, "B*stard."

The teacher had to retire to the ladies because she nearly wet herself!

[Koi]

Not so much of a what kids say but rather what kids do.

Went to the local fare a few years back, son was about 5 ish we won some goldfish as you do.
Ended buying bowl etc, at home put fish in bowl and fed them, kids off to bed followed by us later. Got up a 5am to get ready for work, went in to dining room and gold fish bowl was minus three fish, it was empty. Had a look on floor incase they had jumped out.
Went upstairs to sons room to find him asleep with three goldfish neatly lined up on his pillow next to him. Quickly grabbed fish and had them on toast, no seriously put them back in bowl, somehow all three survived.
Son had woke up and felt sorry for the fish as they were lonely all on their own, so he caught them and took them with him to bed for a cuddle so they were not on their own any more.

[Damian]

Last night whilst working at the youth club this 7 year old arrived smoking pot. 'How cute' I thought as he pulled a knife out at me 'cos I'd snatched the joint from him.

'That would be great' I said,
'bring your father up here and we can have a real good grown up conversation with the local bobby about why your daddy lets you smoke.'

Oh how I laughed!!

Sorry..... didn't mean to lower the tone...... I'll get mi coat......