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My first off road attempt...
...didn't exactly go to plan.
I was away this weekend camping with some friends and family up in the forest of Bowland near Settle, North Yorks. Up near where we were camping is a forest that has some gravel/dirt tracks, so I thought that I would give the Surf a little try out on some loose stuff. On saturday I went up for a little explore and had some fun. My first impressions of the Surf when not on black top is that it really comes alive. Pelting down heavily rutted dirt tracks at 30mph+ was a blast, and the car just took it in its stride.
Anyway, whilst up near the top of the forest I spotted a 'Green Lane' down through some of the trees. The lower branches of the trees was around waist height, and the ground was 'slightly'
boggy, but didn't look anything too bad. However, with sensible head on (only having owned the car 2 weeks, and never having been off-road) I decided to wait until the next day when a mate with a Disco was going to be up.
Next day comes, Geoff turns up, and so later in the day we head up to the lane. We stopped at the entrance, and went on a quick recce to see what it was like. The lane was probably only 100m or so long, but ended in a space that would be big enough for us both to turn round. The ground was a bit muddier than it had been the day before (lots of rain overnight), but still looked like it was passable, and would make a nice easy challenge for us. So in we headed. I took the lead, selected Low Range, and drove in. Everything started off OK, travelling slowly, with the car generally moving in a straight line. After I'm in by around 30m I glance in the rear view, and notice that I'm digging some very deep tracks, and I start to worry a little. I carry on however, but after only another 10m or so I grind to a wheel spinning halt! Geoff, who is behind me and only really just entered the lane by 10m or so, sees that I've stopped, and so he stops too. BIG MISTAKE
We're both stuck!!!
So, we take a quick minute to size the situation up, and weigh our options. We both give the old forwards/backwards rock a try, with the result that we both get dug in deeper and deeper into what we now find to be 8-12 inches of soft top mud over some very stick clay. This is getting us nowhere and it's getting us there fast. Time for Plan B.
Starting with Geoffs Disco we try digging the wheels out a bit and packing round the wheels with branches/twigs/pine leaves, anything we could find that might offer us up some grip. Nothing but spinning wheels and flying mud.
Plan C, we call in some reinforcements from the others in our camping party. After a short wait, we are greeted by various members of the gang who promptly set about having a laugh, and calling us stupid pratts for even trying it, but eventually set about the task of seeing what could be done. We tried everything, more digging, 7 or 8 big lads on the end of a rope pulling, trying to hammer planks under the tyres, and swearing but none of this resulted in the car moving so much as an inch. Now, given that Geoffs Disco is only 10m into the track, and I'm a good 30m beyond that, I'm starting to have serious doubts that the Surf will ever make it out alive.
By this time, it's starting to get a bit late, and the light will be fading soon, so after much deliberation, we decide to abandon the cars for the night and work on Plan D over a few drinks round the campfire.
Plan D involved calling Geoffs sister (who also has a Disco), getting her to go and find anywhere that would sell some rope (bearing in mind that it's late Sunday, and the Monday is a bank holiday) and come up and meet us the next day.
Late Monday morning, Jan arrives. We take her up to the cars where she proceeds to call us both stupid pratts who deserve everything we get. However, eventually she finishes and we start to plan the rescue. A quick survey of the situation shows that quite a lot of water has appeared overnight, and both cars are now islands in their own little ponds.
So, positioning Jans Disco at the entrance to the lane, but making absolutely sure that she stays on the gravel track, we trail a rope down to Geoffs stranded car, and tie the two together. After a couple safety checks, both cars start revving. Geoff is churning up muddy water, and Jans is just spinning its wheels on the wet gravel. After several attempts, still zero movement, and the smell of a slowly baking clutch Plan D is consigned to the bin, and we are on to.....
Plan E. Tractor. So my cousin JM and I set off to try and enlist the services of one of the local farmers and his tractor. We had to try 6 different farms before we got lucky. The farmers out, but his wife reckons he'll be back soon, and would be willing to help. So we go back to the campsite and wait a couple hours. While we wait, we consider options for Plan F (which involve the use of the couple of very big foresty machines that are currently being used as part of the felling operation going on, but as we technically shouldn't really be in the forest anyway it's not a very appealing option). However, Mr Farmer turns up, and we show him the cars. After another round of laughs, and 'What the 'eck were you doing going up there you stupid pratts' we set about attaching the ropes between the tractor and the Disco. The tractor starts pulling, and with quite a bit of effort the Disco starts moving. Once it's out of the real crappy stuff, Geoff tries to keep going under his own steam, but just can't make it up the (fairly slight) gradient that starts the lane off, so the tractor has to pull him right the way out onto the track.
Now it's my turn. We attach the very long bit of rope to my Surf, and start pulling. My car seems to come loose fairly easily, and with a bit of assistance from the tractor we get up to the point that Geoff was stuck before pausing for a quick breather. I'm determined that the lane isn't going to entirely defeat me, so once the tractor has me past Geoffs tyre holes I start to give it some more throttle. It's working, I'm actually managing to drive out the last bit under my own steam. Beaming with pride, it's only after a few seconds that I realise everyone is hollering at me to stop. Jumping on the brakes, I manage to stop about a foot before dissappearing arse end into one of the 4foot deep drainage ditches that is to the side of the entrance to the lane. Gathering my wits, I reposition and drive out successfully without further mishap.
After thanking the farmer profusely, and rewarding him £40 (and the assurance that when these beer tokens had run out, he was guaranteed that the story of how he resuced two stupid townies would get him a few more beers), we start chatting. It turns out that the ground in this area is well known for being particularly treatcherous, and that during the winter months they don't even risk the tractors in it and rely totally on their quads.
So in one short trip, I've got some mud on the Surf, got well and truly stuck, realised I don't know squat about off-roading, and still have a big smile.
Here's to the next off-road trip.
I was away this weekend camping with some friends and family up in the forest of Bowland near Settle, North Yorks. Up near where we were camping is a forest that has some gravel/dirt tracks, so I thought that I would give the Surf a little try out on some loose stuff. On saturday I went up for a little explore and had some fun. My first impressions of the Surf when not on black top is that it really comes alive. Pelting down heavily rutted dirt tracks at 30mph+ was a blast, and the car just took it in its stride.
Anyway, whilst up near the top of the forest I spotted a 'Green Lane' down through some of the trees. The lower branches of the trees was around waist height, and the ground was 'slightly'
boggy, but didn't look anything too bad. However, with sensible head on (only having owned the car 2 weeks, and never having been off-road) I decided to wait until the next day when a mate with a Disco was going to be up.Next day comes, Geoff turns up, and so later in the day we head up to the lane. We stopped at the entrance, and went on a quick recce to see what it was like. The lane was probably only 100m or so long, but ended in a space that would be big enough for us both to turn round. The ground was a bit muddier than it had been the day before (lots of rain overnight), but still looked like it was passable, and would make a nice easy challenge for us. So in we headed. I took the lead, selected Low Range, and drove in. Everything started off OK, travelling slowly, with the car generally moving in a straight line. After I'm in by around 30m I glance in the rear view, and notice that I'm digging some very deep tracks, and I start to worry a little. I carry on however, but after only another 10m or so I grind to a wheel spinning halt! Geoff, who is behind me and only really just entered the lane by 10m or so, sees that I've stopped, and so he stops too. BIG MISTAKE
We're both stuck!!!
So, we take a quick minute to size the situation up, and weigh our options. We both give the old forwards/backwards rock a try, with the result that we both get dug in deeper and deeper into what we now find to be 8-12 inches of soft top mud over some very stick clay. This is getting us nowhere and it's getting us there fast. Time for Plan B.
Starting with Geoffs Disco we try digging the wheels out a bit and packing round the wheels with branches/twigs/pine leaves, anything we could find that might offer us up some grip. Nothing but spinning wheels and flying mud.
Plan C, we call in some reinforcements from the others in our camping party. After a short wait, we are greeted by various members of the gang who promptly set about having a laugh, and calling us stupid pratts for even trying it, but eventually set about the task of seeing what could be done. We tried everything, more digging, 7 or 8 big lads on the end of a rope pulling, trying to hammer planks under the tyres, and swearing but none of this resulted in the car moving so much as an inch. Now, given that Geoffs Disco is only 10m into the track, and I'm a good 30m beyond that, I'm starting to have serious doubts that the Surf will ever make it out alive.
By this time, it's starting to get a bit late, and the light will be fading soon, so after much deliberation, we decide to abandon the cars for the night and work on Plan D over a few drinks round the campfire.
Plan D involved calling Geoffs sister (who also has a Disco), getting her to go and find anywhere that would sell some rope (bearing in mind that it's late Sunday, and the Monday is a bank holiday) and come up and meet us the next day.
Late Monday morning, Jan arrives. We take her up to the cars where she proceeds to call us both stupid pratts who deserve everything we get. However, eventually she finishes and we start to plan the rescue. A quick survey of the situation shows that quite a lot of water has appeared overnight, and both cars are now islands in their own little ponds.
So, positioning Jans Disco at the entrance to the lane, but making absolutely sure that she stays on the gravel track, we trail a rope down to Geoffs stranded car, and tie the two together. After a couple safety checks, both cars start revving. Geoff is churning up muddy water, and Jans is just spinning its wheels on the wet gravel. After several attempts, still zero movement, and the smell of a slowly baking clutch Plan D is consigned to the bin, and we are on to.....Plan E. Tractor. So my cousin JM and I set off to try and enlist the services of one of the local farmers and his tractor. We had to try 6 different farms before we got lucky. The farmers out, but his wife reckons he'll be back soon, and would be willing to help. So we go back to the campsite and wait a couple hours. While we wait, we consider options for Plan F (which involve the use of the couple of very big foresty machines that are currently being used as part of the felling operation going on, but as we technically shouldn't really be in the forest anyway it's not a very appealing option). However, Mr Farmer turns up, and we show him the cars. After another round of laughs, and 'What the 'eck were you doing going up there you stupid pratts' we set about attaching the ropes between the tractor and the Disco. The tractor starts pulling, and with quite a bit of effort the Disco starts moving. Once it's out of the real crappy stuff, Geoff tries to keep going under his own steam, but just can't make it up the (fairly slight) gradient that starts the lane off, so the tractor has to pull him right the way out onto the track.
Now it's my turn. We attach the very long bit of rope to my Surf, and start pulling. My car seems to come loose fairly easily, and with a bit of assistance from the tractor we get up to the point that Geoff was stuck before pausing for a quick breather. I'm determined that the lane isn't going to entirely defeat me, so once the tractor has me past Geoffs tyre holes I start to give it some more throttle. It's working, I'm actually managing to drive out the last bit under my own steam. Beaming with pride, it's only after a few seconds that I realise everyone is hollering at me to stop. Jumping on the brakes, I manage to stop about a foot before dissappearing arse end into one of the 4foot deep drainage ditches that is to the side of the entrance to the lane. Gathering my wits, I reposition and drive out successfully without further mishap.
After thanking the farmer profusely, and rewarding him £40 (and the assurance that when these beer tokens had run out, he was guaranteed that the story of how he resuced two stupid townies would get him a few more beers), we start chatting. It turns out that the ground in this area is well known for being particularly treatcherous, and that during the winter months they don't even risk the tractors in it and rely totally on their quads.
So in one short trip, I've got some mud on the Surf, got well and truly stuck, realised I don't know squat about off-roading, and still have a big smile.
Here's to the next off-road trip.
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