Funny for the day

[colincd]

Sorry could not help myself

Just HAD to post this pic

[Cmar]

Hmmm? Dont know why I'm laughin'... See my post "Fender Bender"

[Draig]

you'll now get all the women's attention - phew - saves me at last lol

[colincd]

One a day :-)

you'll now get all the women's attention - phew - saves me at last lol

Ho no

Forgot about "Doris"

[Draig]

now you're for it, now you're for it, now you're for it

[Draig]

Diet Tips For Healthy Eating



Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it. Don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster.
Want to live longer. Take a nap.


Q: Should I cut down on meats and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (a green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable slop.


Q: Is beer or wine bad for me?

A: Look, it goes to the earlier point about fruits and vegetables. As we all know, scientists divide everything in the world into three categories: animal, mineral, and vegetable. We all know that beer and wine are not animal, and they are not on the periodic table of elements, so that only leaves one thing, right? My advice: Have a
burger and a beer and enjoy your liquid vegetables.


Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?


A: Well, if you have a body, and you have body fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.


Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?


A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain - Good.



Q: If I stop smoking will I live longer?

A: Nope. Smoking is a sign of individual expression and peace of mind. If you stop, you'll probably stress yourself to death in record time.


Q: Aren't fried food bad for me?

A: You're not listening! Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?


Q: What's the secret to healthy eating?

A: Thicker gravy.


Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.


Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: Are you crazy? HELLO...Cocoa beans...Another vegetable!!!

[colincd]

Brill :-)

thats what I have been telling the wife for years

[Draig]

shh - trying to get us out of trouble with the girlies - thought i'd post some generic tips to take the heat off us.

[Bryan]

Not sure which of these I laughed at most?


http://www.brianmung.com/blainegame.htm

http://www.miniclip.com/arnie.htm

[colincd]

Great Game

Not sure which of these I laughed at mot?


http://www.brianmung.com/blainegame.htm

http://www.miniclip.com/arnie.htm

Its GOT to be the "Blain Game"

[Purpledoris]

did anyone manage to shoot the b*gger down - I got fed up and decided to see what you guys were doing - It was on B3ta this week and last week!

Here's a nice link to amuse you

www.stupidnorthernmonkey.co.uk/

And don't worry about the sexist stuff - i actually find it very funny but I'd be letting the side down if I didn't retaliate, keep at it, gives me ideas............

[colincd]

Shot Him Down

did anyone manage to shoot the b*gger down - I got fed up and decided to see what you guys were doing - It was on B3ta this week and last week!

Managed it on the third go

GOT to have sound though, i have only just stopped Laughing

[Linda]

[/QUOTE]And don't worry about the sexist stuff - i actually find it very funny but I'd be letting the side down if I didn't retaliate, keep at it, gives me ideas............[/QUOTE]




I agree - some of it's hilarious and we're more than able to get our own back!!!!

[hormygollop]

And don't worry about the sexist stuff - i actually find it very funny but I'd be letting the side down if I didn't retaliate, keep at it, gives me ideas............[/QUOTE]I agree - some of it's hilarious and we're more than able to get our own back!!!![/QUOTE]

Pfffff all talk and nothin

[colincd]

Pfffff all talk and nothin[/QUOTE]


NOW you have gone and dun it