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  • Food for thought

    Found on another forum a bit of food for thought?
    Its long but stick with it

    HOW IT WORKS AND SHOULD WORK IN A FAIR WORLD

    The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building
    and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

    The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the
    summer away.

    Come winter the squirrel is warm and well fed, the shivering grasshopper
    has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

    THE END

    THE BRITISH VERSION

    The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building
    and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

    The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and plays the summer away;
    Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed.

    A social worker finds the shivering grasshopper, calls a press
    conference and demands to know why the squirrel should be allowed to be
    warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like the grasshopper, are
    cold and starving.

    The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper
    with cuts to a video of the squirrel in his comfortable warm home with a
    table laden with food.

    The British press inform people that they should be ashamed that in a
    country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer while
    others have plenty.

    The Labour Party, Greenpeace, Animal Rights and the Grasshopper Council
    of GB demonstrate in front of the squirrel's house. The BBC,
    interrupting a cultural festival special from Notting Hill with breaking
    news, broadcasts a multi cultural choir singing "We Shall Overcome".

    Ken Livingstone rants in an interview with Trevor McDonald that the
    squirrel has got rich off the backs of grasshoppers and calls for an
    immediate tax hike on the squirrel to make him pay his "fair share" and
    increases the charge for squirrels to enter inner London.

    In response to pressure from the media, the Government drafts the
    Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti-Discrimination Act, retroactive to
    the beginning of the summer.

    The squirrel's taxes are reassessed. He is taken to court and fined for
    failing to hire grasshoppers as builders for the work he was doing on
    his home and an additional fine for contempt when he told the court the
    grasshopper did not want to work.

    The grasshopper is provided with a council house, financial aid to
    furnish it and an account with a local taxi firm to ensure he can be
    socially mobile. The squirrel's food is seized and re-distributed to the
    more needy members of society, in this case the grasshopper.

    Without enough money to buy more food, to pay the fine and his newly
    imposed retroactive taxes, the squirrel has to downsize and start
    building a new home.

    The local authority takes over his old home and utilises it as a
    temporary home for asylum seeking cats who had hijacked a plane to get
    to Britain as they had to share their country of origin with mice. On
    arrival they have tried to blow up the airport because of Britain's
    apparent love of dogs.

    The cats had been arrested for the international offence of hijacking
    and attempted bombing but were immediately released because the police
    fed them pilchards instead of salmon whilst in custody.
    Initial moves to then return them to their own country were abandoned
    because it was feared they would face death by the mice. The cats
    devise and start a scam to obtain money from people's credit cards.

    A Panorama special shows the grasshopper finishing up the last of the
    squirrel's food, though Spring is still months away, while the council
    house he is in crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to
    maintain the house. He is shown to be taking drugs and inadequate
    government funding is blamed for the grasshopper' s drug 'illness'.

    The cats seek recompense in the British courts for their treatment since
    arrival in the UK.

    The grasshopper gets arrested for stabbing an old dog during a burglary
    to get money for his drugs habit. He is imprisoned but released
    immediately because he has been in custody for a few weeks. He is
    placed in the care of the Probation Service to monitor and supervise
    him. Within a few weeks he has killed a guinea pig in a botched robbery.

    A commission of enquiry that will eventually cost £10,000,000 and state
    the obvious, is set up. Additional money is put into funding a drug
    rehabilitation scheme for grasshoppers, and legal aid for lawyers
    representing asylum seekers is increased.

    The asylum seeking cats are praised by the government for enriching
    Britain's multicultural diversity and dogs are criticised by the
    government for failing to befriend the cats.

    The grasshopper dies of a drug overdose. The usual sections of the
    press blame it on the obvious failure of government to address the root
    causes of despair arising from social inequity and his traumatic
    experience of prison. They call for the resignation of a minister.
    The cats are paid a million pounds each because their rights were
    infringed when the government failed to inform them there were mice in
    the United Kingdom.

    The squirrel, the dogs and the victims of the hijacking, the bombing,
    the burglaries and robberies have to pay an additional percentage on
    their credit cards to cover the losses, their taxes are increased to pay
    for law and order and they are told that they will have to work beyond
    65 because of a shortfall in government funds.

    THE END
    Last edited by Glen3337; 15 February 2007, 16:01.

  • #2
    Funny but oh so true in Britain today. Social services, what a bunch of wasters constantly making error after error but still allowed to continue with unbelievable imcompetence. This country is a joke, the harder you work, abide by the rules and generally be decent the more you get sh!t upon.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by beaufighter
      Funny but oh so true in Britain today. Social services, what a bunch of wasters constantly making error after error but still allowed to continue with unbelievable imcompetence. This country is a joke, the harder you work, abide by the rules and generally be decent the more you get sh!t upon.
      Thats just why I posted the thread......I feel the same.....

      Comment


      • #4
        Hear, hear, soon all the working people will leave England ( I nearly said Brittain but the Scots have left the union coz they've had enough) and it will be as the S e x pistols said in 1979... Britain, just another council tennancy...
        Rob

        Still working for the man!

        Comment

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