@ Greebo

[Morr]

Aha Greebo, I thought the handle was vaguely familiar, things dropping into place now, your profile says you enjoy reading, now your signature has a cat in, do I take it you're a Discworld fan ??

[andy]

To the rest of the world, Greebo is an enormous tomcat with a skin that looks less like fur then a patchwork quilt, no ears and only one eye. Greebo is a malevolent collection of life force who won't hesitate to fight or rape anything (As a matter of pride). Dogs hide when Greebo's on the prowl, Foxes detour around Lancre and even Wolves avoid him.

[Gamedawn]

As long as we don't get any of Nanny Ogg's recipes quoted. That really would take the forum off line

[rusty]

As long as we don't get any of Nanny Ogg's recipes quoted. That really would take the forum off line

Spell "Wizzard"

[TonyN]

We should arrange a wheelin' trip to the Ramtops!

The Gods have probably closed all the greenlanes up the Hub.

[surffreak]

yes but who knows the lyrics for the hedgehog song ?

I have a copy of it and it is very god

[TonyN]

yes but who knows the lyrics for the hedgehog song ?

I have a copy of it and it is very god

whats the chances of 'mailing me a copy?

[surffreak]

ok will do just have to take it off the mp3 player first

[andy]

You can bugger the bear, if you do it with care,
in the winter, when he is asleep in his lair,
Though I would not advise it in spring or in fall--
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 2. If you're feeling quite coarse, you can bugger the horse,
or the palfrey, the jennet, the stallion (with force),
You can bugger the donkey, the mare, or the mule,
Though to bugger the pony is needlessly cruel. 3. You can bugger the ox (if you stand on a box)
And vulpologists say you can bugger the fox,
You can bugger the shrew, though it's awfully small--
but the hedgehog cvan never be buggered at all. 4. Herptologists gasp you can bugger the asp,
Entymologists claim you can bugger the wasp.
If an insects your thing, man, then just have a ball--
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 5. And the elephant too, that you meet in the zoo,
Can be buggered if you are sure just what to do,
You will need a large mattress upon which to fall--
but the hedgehog cvan never be buggered at all. 6. You can bugger the bees if your down on your knees,
You can bugger the termites with terminal ease
you can bugger the beetle, the ladybug (bird!) too,
there's no end to the buggering that you can do. 7. You can bugger the cat if it isn't to fat
You can bugger the rabbit you draw from your hat
You can bugger the shark that you've chased in your yawl--
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 8. You can bugger the ermine, and all other vermine,
like rats, mice, and roaches, if your not discernin'.
You can bugger the dog, it will come when you call--
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 9. Although Mr. Tiggy is not very big, he
Avoids with great ease those who fancy his arse.
He just curls in a ball, shows his prickles and all--
And the would-be seducer leaves himin the grass 10. If you're that kind of fool, and you have a long tool,
Do it with a giraffe, if you stand on a stool,
Catch a yeti, who lives in the snows of Nepal--
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 11. For the hedgehog escapes the posterior rapes
Performed upon others of different shapes
Those who run, swim, or slither, they get it withal--
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 12. It is said, if you try, you can bugger the fly,
Or the swallow as it skims so skilfully by,
Use a noose or a net, or lime (if you've the gall)--
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all 13. You can bugger the cow (I will not tell you how),
Or the boar, or the piglet, the shoat or the sow,
You can bugger the ass as it stands in the stall--
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 14. You can order or shoo 'im, or run a knife through 'im
The one thing you cannot do is stick it to 'im.
If you try to seduce 'im, you'll end in a fix,
His prickles defend him against rampant pricks. 15. You can bugger the ram, you can bugger the lamb,
You can bugger the ewe, though the wether's a sham,
You can bugger the tiger (it may caterwaul)
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 16. You can bugger the seal, you can bugger the eel,
You can bugger the crab, though they say it can't feel,
You can bugger the bat as the night casts its pall,
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 17. You can bugger the snake (hold it down with a rake),
Though to bugger the quetzal may be a mistake.
You can bugger the billy, the nanny the kid,
But to bugger the hedeghog just cannot be did. 18. You can bugger the slug, though it messes the rug,
You can bugger the different species of bug,
Or do it with a snail, if you slow to a crawl,
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all. 19. At the end of the day, when you've had your rough way
With all of those creatures, you'll just have to say
"That damned Erinaceous has been my downfall--"
For the hedgehog can never be buggered at all!

[surffreak]

hmmm i will need an address to send it cant use the froum one as no way to attach and hotmail wont accept a file that large

[TonyN]

hmmm i will need an address to send it cant use the froum one as no way to attach and hotmail wont accept a file that large

Send it to

tony@driveinmud.fsnet.co.uk

Cheers!

[surffreak]

thats not quite the version that i have got but it is along thoes lines

[TonyN]

So is there an 'official' Terry Pratchett version, or have others just improvised?

[surffreak]

its on its way

[surffreak]

i have not see it in any of the books but it might be in one of the companions, i came across it on kazaa once and downloaded it.