old tales

[dirtydog]

my mum told me when the ice cream van plays 'music' it means they have run out of ice cream..

thats genious!!

My Grandad told me I would go bald if i kep wearing hats/caps... dont wear them more than one day at a time now

[Draig]

what is worrying is that I've heard most of these - and look at how widespread the folks on here are!

Have we unearthed a national pastime? I'm amazed!

[kitesurf_phil]

I was talking to a mate up at the scrap yard today and this subject came up. His Gran told him that if he put too much vinegar on his food his blood would dry up.

Oh, and my hair goes curly at the back, if I grow it long, because I ate my bread crusts.

[jax]

My mum told me that thunder was two clouds bumping together. When I was at primary school, I argued with a teacher when she told me it wasn't.

At Christmas, I used to be told to go up the hillside and see if I could see Santa choosing what deer he wanted for the sleigh (I must admit, I still have a look around - just in case!)

When I was young, my mum and dad told my sister and I that there were 'ghost' headlights up at the Laird's house. This was the talk of the Glen. The lights would come half way up the drive and disappear. We were terrified. Years later dad admitted that it was one of our farm lads and the Laird's daughter parking up the side of the wood. The Laird never found out!

.........................
Jacqueline

[Chillitt]

my favourite lie to the kids story is in calvin and hobbes. the father explains that old photos are colour pictures, and the whole world was black and white back then.....

[Leodis]

I was told that i would go !!!!!!! BLIND !!!!!!

I cant see that

[Koi]

My dad used to tell me if i wasn't in by a certain time I would get the belt, I wasn't in by said time and felt the belt. Thats the only thing as I have grown older that I have found to be the truth, the rest, well wives tales.

[Donk_UK]

I thought thunder was clouds crashing together? ! lol I could of sworn its something to do with 2 lots of positive cloud particals banging in to each other or 2 negative particals.

[laser_jock99]

Fed up with my 3 year son still wanting a bottle of milk in the middle of the night I told him "Drink too much milk and you'll turn into a cow!"


Totally unpreturbed his reply was "Will I be a brown one or black & white one daddy?"

Nevillef

[kitesurf_phil]

If we made too much noise in Nan and Grandads garden, Grandad would say, "You'll wake the dead on Galley Hill." It used to quieten us down.........for a bit.


(Galley Hill is an ancient burial site near Luton).

[da SLUG man]

my mum told me i shouldn't look up girls skirts cos they've got teeth up there and they'll bite you!

years later when i had my first girlfriend, she wanted me to "touch her lady bits" i said "as long as it doesn't bite me!"... i explained the story to her and had a look... no teeth!!... i said "Not surprised, look at the state of your gums!"...

hahaha!!

[Purpledoris]

A personal fave - my dad used to tell my little brother to stop picking his nose cause his head would cave in! he never caught me at it.........
Oh and if you swallow bubble gum you'll blow bubbles when you fart and your shreddies will get stuck to your bum and have to be removed in hospital! No wonder I still can't stand the stuff!

[freerange]

I was always told that your belly button is for putting salt in when you're eating fish n chips in bed. Obviously a Yorkshire belly button!

My mum had a dual-purpose one for cabbage... She'd turn to my brother and say "Eat your cabbage, it'll put hairs on your chest" then turn to me and say: "Eat your cabbage, it'll make your bust grow" !!!

I leave you to wonder which one worked!

[silvtr1000]

My mate Les' dad told him that little people lived in a miniature house in the ditch in Donegal where they used to live. Les got into an argument one night with some friends over some cans on the beach (14 years old or so?), claiming that little people do exist, and they live in little houses in ditches.

I had Oh Well (Part 1) by Fleetwood Mac playing in my car one day when I was giving Les a lift, and he asked who it was. I said Fleetwood Mac. He said "that f*!cking b@stard! My dad used to sing that to me when I was a kid and said it was his own song!"