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cold, tired and wet

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  • cold, tired and wet

    On returning from a pheasant shoot today on the other side of the hill, I had left the quad bike in one of the fields so I could ride it back home instead of driving as I had planned on having a festive drink with the shoot boys. Well, later on it was pitch black and foggy and I couldn't find the bl**dy bike.

    Staggering about looking for it, I tripped over something (which I soon found out was barbed wire). By this time I had started to roll down the hill and the wire came with me. I then splashed into the muddy water in the ditch (1ft deep) trussed up like a turkey with the barbed wire.

    Struggling to my feet, I quickly discovered that it was the place where the cows come down to drink, so not only was I wet and muddy, I was also covered in cow cr*p!

    I still couldn't find the quad bike so I thought I might as well walk home. At home I started to take my stinking clothes off in the porch. Was just down to my undies and one sock when the door opened and my son and his friends filed past on their way to the pub. My son just managed to hold it together long enough to say 'good shoot then Mum?'

    I doubt if I can show my face down the village this side of Christmas.

    .......................
    Jacqueline

  • #2
    Originally posted by jax
    On returning from a pheasant shoot today on the other side of the hill, I had left the quad bike in one of the fields so I could ride it back home instead of driving as I had planned on having a festive drink with the shoot boys. Well, later on it was pitch black and foggy and I couldn't find the bl**dy bike.

    Staggering about looking for it, I tripped over something (which I soon found out was barbed wire). By this time I had started to roll down the hill and the wire came with me. I then splashed into the muddy water in the ditch (1ft deep) trussed up like a turkey with the barbed wire.

    Struggling to my feet, I quickly discovered that it was the place where the cows come down to drink, so not only was I wet and muddy, I was also covered in cow cr*p!

    I still couldn't find the quad bike so I thought I might as well walk home. At home I started to take my stinking clothes off in the porch. Was just down to my undies and one sock when the door opened and my son and his friends filed past on their way to the pub. My son just managed to hold it together long enough to say 'good shoot then Mum?'

    I doubt if I can show my face down the village this side of Christmas.

    .......................
    Jacqueline
    Sounds like you could do with a stiff drink and a cuddle.

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    • #3
      keepers probably nicked it...
      it's in me shed, mate.

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      • #4
        hey if you go again can we all come sounds like fun part from the poo bit
        Enjoying Life after Cancer
        Pops

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        • #5
          Originally posted by TAZMAN
          Sounds like you could do with a stiff drink and a cuddle.

          awhhhhh, bless

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          • #6
            Update: Managed to find the quad bike this morning - it hadn't been nicked by the keeper! Think I'll get a lift next time though.

            PS. Urgently in need of a hangover kit.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by jax

              PS. Urgently in need of a hangover kit.
              Try Irn Bru its Scotlands other national drink and great for the morning after.




              Ps Whereabouts in Fife I used to live in East Wemyss between Leven and Kirkcaldy.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Leodis
                Try Irn Bru its Scotlands other national drink and great for the morning after.




                Ps Whereabouts in Fife I used to live in East Wemyss between Leven and Kirkcaldy.
                My friend lives in West Wemyss! I live on the outskirts of Largoward which is 7mls from Leven and 7mls from St Andrews. The main Leven/St Andrews road goes through the middle of the village but it hasn't even got a shop or mains gas and has frequent power cuts and sometimes the sewer system is on overload - I'll leave that to the imagination! It's a nice place really.

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