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A chap is driving around London when he sees a sign in front of a house --
"Talking Dog For Sale."
He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the garden.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador sitting there.
"You talk, Mate?" he asks. "Yes, Sir" the Lab replies.
"So, what's the story?"
The Lab. looks up and says: "Well, I discovered that I could talk when
I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told Mi5
about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country
to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one
figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable
spies for eight years running.
But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't
getting any younger so I decided to settle down.
I signed up for a job at the Heathrow to do some undercover security
wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered
some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married,
had a load of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants
for the dog.
"Ten Quid," the man says.
"Ten pounds? This dog is brilliant. Why on earth are you selling him so
cheaply?"
"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit."
"Talking Dog For Sale."
He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the garden.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador sitting there.
"You talk, Mate?" he asks. "Yes, Sir" the Lab replies.
"So, what's the story?"
The Lab. looks up and says: "Well, I discovered that I could talk when
I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told Mi5
about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country
to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one
figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable
spies for eight years running.
But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't
getting any younger so I decided to settle down.
I signed up for a job at the Heathrow to do some undercover security
wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered
some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married,
had a load of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants
for the dog.
"Ten Quid," the man says.
"Ten pounds? This dog is brilliant. Why on earth are you selling him so
cheaply?"
"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit."