Dog food diet

[Mitsy]

I have a big dog & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in
Tesco and standing in the queue at the till.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Winalot
Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended
up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds
before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes
coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the
way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with
Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you
feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I
was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the
queue was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a
guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that
condition because I had been poisoned.

I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the road
licking my b*lls and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

Stupid c*w..........why else would I buy dog food??