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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
5. Get rid of your cat.
6. Sunday = Sports
7. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
8. Women wearing wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain
about having their boobs stared at.
9. You have too many shoes.
10 Crying is blackmail.
11. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
12. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
13. If it itches, it will be scratched.
14. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
15. A headache for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
16. If you don't want to know the answer, dont ask the question.
17. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
18. If you think you bum looks big in something, you're probably right.
19. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes
you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
20. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you
are?
21. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done - Not
both.
22. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
23. You have enough clothes.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
5. Get rid of your cat.
6. Sunday = Sports
7. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
8. Women wearing wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain
about having their boobs stared at.
9. You have too many shoes.
10 Crying is blackmail.
11. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
12. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
13. If it itches, it will be scratched.
14. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
15. A headache for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
16. If you don't want to know the answer, dont ask the question.
17. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
18. If you think you bum looks big in something, you're probably right.
19. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes
you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
20. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you
are?
21. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done - Not
both.
22. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
23. You have enough clothes.