A Nation Mourns..

[That Ruddy Squirrel]

Hope he makes you a decent offer

[pops]

well i dont know what the answer is
i would suggest the answer could be "IN YOUR SHED MATE"
but that would be insensitive at this traumatic time

[Chillitt]

the roof is finest mineral roofing felt. no leaks there...

[andy]

If you get a insurance pay out can I have the green barrow, had a blow out on mine the other week at 1 mph, so need a new one soon.

[TheWolfCub]

It's a fake!

Is it just me. This shed appears to be a completely different colour. I think that Chillitt is just seeking attention. In truth I believe that this picture is a FAKE!

In reality this is just a cunning rouse to avoid answering the question raised a week or two ago, namely:

"What is in yer shed?!?"

[Dog_Book]

I think now is the time to fit a snorkel to your Surf Chillit and go and investigate your shed. Remember to engage 4wd as it looks wet!!!!

[The Kid]

Although starting the wake without waiting for the many thousands of mourners who would liked to have attended should result in a total lack of sympathy and helpful advice, human nature decrees that we should all pitch in regardless, so here goes:

a) Demolish the shed before the floods go down. This will give you the perfect opportunity to invest in one of those rc flying boat/plane/car thingys on a recent thread.

b) Add more water, stock with carp (KOI naturally) and make a fortune from the fishing fraternity by renting out at extortionate rates..

c) As b), do not add carp,stir well, and offer to forum members as new off road centre (at even more extortionate rates and make a bigger fortune.

d) Start a Chillitt Midlands Tsunami Appeal and transfer not less than 50% to a slush fund.
(I would be more than happy to organise and collect donations on your behalf which should be made in cash and paid into my Swiss bank a/c.)

If not demolishing I would suggest 2 improvements to avoid a similar catastrophe in the future as follows;

Resite shed to new location placing it centrally over a hole 10' x 10' by 20' deep, thus allowing the water to run away without damaging the shed.

If, as you say, the roof does not leak and the landscape is such that flooding on this scale is likely to occur regularly due to global warming, then logically you should rotate the shed by 180 degrees using levers, 3 JCBs and a 150' crane (if these are not available a 3.0L Surf will be more than adequate), thereby resting it on its apex. To stabilise the structure you would need supports either side. Ideal supports would be 1 x S****N and 1X P****O as these would sink into the mud a couple of inches and would then be immovable.
(Full diagrams, architect drawings, flow charts, equipment list and where to purchase the necessary 10 cases of Stella needed to complete this task can be supplied on request. A 10% cash deposit of £5000, paid into the bank a/c above, would be required and the approximate waiting time would be 10 years, due to the exeptional number of requests to rescue flooded sheds we have received recently. Had the wake not been started without us we could have reduced the cost slightly to 2 1/2p plus the cost of the Stella)

Ken

[Gizmo]

flip

Get some rowing boats and charge!....new boat house

[That Ruddy Squirrel]

Get some rowing boats and charge!....new boat house

hmmmmmmmmmmmm

idea

You have already stated tha the roofing material is waterproof, why not use it for a ground sheet and turn said wooden structure into a houseboat ?

With a houseboat you will have an exclusive dwelling, and will be able to charge a higher rent for tenants

If you were to park/sink a few Sm**tcars (if these are in short supply then B*Ws or A**ras will suffice) you could use them as mooring posts



Trev

[ship]

my shed insurance has gone to sleep...........

chillit, think of it as a moat not a flood

[DaveD]

Looks like you could do with a lift kit.................

[Chillitt]

And yea, the man who pitcheth his tent close to the stream will not have to carry water far, but after the flood he will find his load heavy indeed
gospel according to chillitt 4;16

[That Ruddy Squirrel]

Hey Chillitt,


Remind your lodger about Confucious

When you have a water bed you are meant to float on the bed in the shed, NOT you and the bed are meant to float in the shed

I always though that to get tired you were meant to count sheep, not bream


Trev

[Djandco]

I had a similar experiance a few years ago, thus remedied by building a small wall to site the new shed in a safer zone, plus the 1.5 ton of conc for the floor to avoid damp, and just to add a twist, fitted double glazing and an automatic door.
After the initial heart ache, I decided to go for broke and give it a re-model.
Now I know if it rains like that again it wont float away!!

[sumo]

Hmmmmmm I have a cunning plan...