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Junior School Children Writing about the Sea. Priceless!!!
1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly
age 6)
2) Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6)
3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an island. If you don't have
sea all around you, you are incontinent. ( Wayne age 7)
4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)
5) A dolphin breaths through an ar**ehole on the top of its head.
(Billy age 8)
6) My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs.
(Nikki age 6)
7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the
ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to
make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans.
(William age 7)
8) I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails.
How do mermaids get pregnant? ( Helena age 6)
9) I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always
screaming and being sick, my dad keeps shouting at my mum, and my big
sister
has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)
10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give
you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they
have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)
11) When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it make my willy
small. (Kevin age 6)
12) Divers have to be safe whey they go under the water. Two divers can't
go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)
13) On holiday my mum went water skiing. She fell off when she was going
very fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her
fanny. (Julia age 7)
1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly
age 6)
2) Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6)
3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an island. If you don't have
sea all around you, you are incontinent. ( Wayne age 7)
4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)
5) A dolphin breaths through an ar**ehole on the top of its head.
(Billy age 8)
6) My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs.
(Nikki age 6)
7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the
ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to
make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans.
(William age 7)
8) I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails.
How do mermaids get pregnant? ( Helena age 6)
9) I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always
screaming and being sick, my dad keeps shouting at my mum, and my big
sister
has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)
10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give
you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they
have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)
11) When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it make my willy
small. (Kevin age 6)
12) Divers have to be safe whey they go under the water. Two divers can't
go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)
13) On holiday my mum went water skiing. She fell off when she was going
very fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her
fanny. (Julia age 7)